Sunday, November 1, 2009

12:34 PM

Dear Ning,

I went to see Ah Jahn Ek and Ah Jahn Tong already. They will help you do blessing and they also read our fortune. Ah ning, u must believe me we will make things work ok? I also did s Sayan, ha tiow, so it will give us more blessings. I know you'd have no objection right?

Ning, i got a new job at a new bank. the pay is not bad, so i'll be able to take good care of you. The plan is still the same, u come out, i go back thailand with you to get married first. But if my job is good, i'll stay in SG to work first, but i will go to thailand every month to see you ok mai? I save more $ then i will go thailand more frequently. and when u can come SG, maybe u come SG live with me and i take care you nah?

I bai bangkok on Tuesday liao. To see ah may and to buy somethings. Ah ning, wat u want? i buy for you ok? I will come back very soon, dont worry alright.

Ah ning, I love you very much, please tell me nothing has changed ok? I really will wait for you. Ning, I love you.

Tee rak,

Friday, October 30, 2009

12:16 AM


I am going to Ah Chan Tong tomorrow to pray for you and us. Your HSA report is coming out soon. I hope Ah Chan Tong can help you with his blessings. And for you, I will get a tattoo to protect us. Okay na ka? I am willing to do anything for you, just for you to be safe and happy.

I am very determined to make this future ours. Irregardless of anything, i want to stick it out with you. No matter what, i am determined to love you with all my life.

Collin and Ju went to BKK already. Maybe they will meet Ah may. May is thinking of going to work at Cambodia then JB. When she work in JB, i will fetch her to prison to visit u again. Dont worry assured Chao Chiu Mai Dai na ka? Jin Jin mi mi ah liao kap, rak kun mak mak na.

Please stay healthy and happy inside. I want a happy bride in April. =)
Wife, I love you. with all my heart and soul. Goodnight

Loving you so much,

Thursday, October 29, 2009

12:32 AM

My Wife, i can wait forever

You look so beautiful today
When you're sitting there it's hard for me to look away
So i try to find the words that i could say
I know distance doesn't matter but you feel so far away
And I cant lie
Every time I leave my heart turns gray
And I want to come back home to see your face
And I
Cause I just cant take it

Another day without you with me
Is like a blade that cuts right through me
But I can wait
I can wait forever
When you call my heart stops beating
When you're gone it wont stop bleeding
But I can wait
I can wait forever

You look so beautiful today
It's like every time I turn around I see your face
The thing I miss the most is waking up next to you
When I look into your eyes, I wish that I could stay
And I cant lie
Every time I leave my heart turns gray
And I want to come back home to see your face
And I
Cause I just cant take it

Another day without you with me
Is like a blade that cuts right through me
But I can wait
I can wait forever
When you call my heart stops beating
When you're gone it wont stop bleeding
But I can wait
I can wait forever

I know it feels like forever
I guess that's just the price I gotta pay
But when I come back home to feel your touch
Makes it better
Till that day
Theres nothing else that I can do
And I just cant take it
I just cant take it

Another day without you with me
Is like a blade that cuts right through me
But i can wait
I can wait forever (I can wait forever)
When you call my heart stops beating
When you're gone it wont stop bleeding
But I can wait
I can wait forever
I can wait forever
I can wait forever... because i really love you


Wednesday, October 28, 2009

11:40 am


I did alot of things over the week..i went for a few job interviews n got a few jobs offer. I am still deciding which one to choose. I know wat u would say. U would ask me to choose the one i am happy with right? =)

Baby,i also went to the temple to pray and get blessings. I pray for u to be happy, pray that we will get through this ordeal n become stronger. Pray for yours and my father, mother. Hope that they will be healthy n happy, n pray for ah may work will be good..

I got a good news for u. The temple will teach thai every sunday from 1pm to 3pm. I will go and register and learn thai..then next time we can communicate ok?

darling, wait for me ok? i still love you, still want to be with you. i love you jin jin...

Your love,

Tuesday, October 27, 2009



yuu baan liao. very tired nah, but i found work to do. So have to start saving $ and plan for u and me. Do not worry about anything, i take care you until i die ok mai?

Ning, i really miss you. I feel so bad for not being able to see you. But the lawyer also cannot help much. please dont feel abandoned. When ur inside, and me outside, i still miss you, i dont want to lose you. I pray day and night that our faith will go on. I really want to spend the rest of my life with you jin jin.

Theres nothing much i can do, i have my fears, but one thing i know is this -

Ning, i still love you very much. Please believe me.

Ur husband to be,

Monday, October 26, 2009

10:23 AM


sorry ah, last night i was busy doing research for my business then fell asleep. Today i got 3 interviews. Need to find work to do soon, else no $, need to pay car also. How are you inside? Ur english got improve or not? Be hardworking ok? Then next time u come out english will be good. I go save some $ and i learn learn thai, so next time can communicate better.

Baby, now i going out to buy parking for the car, then later in the afternoon got 3 interviews. Wish me luck ok? I will write again when i come back this evening..

Ur husband,

Sunday, October 25, 2009

12:25 pm

ti rak ti rak ti rak,

Today is sunday. U sabai sabai or not? U know my pe-arn know new thai girl from thailand, ah gab. She is like u little girl..very narak. Everytime i see her, i think of u nah.but dont worry,i dont like her, cos i got u. She think my pe-arn narak ah,now together happy mak me and u. Haha..

Darling, i wrote u another letter. U see mai? U got write back to me or not? I hope u can faster write back to me nah. I want to hear from u!

Baby,now i always write in the afternoon,cos at night, tired, nong very fast. U not angry nah?but everynight i still say i love u...ok?

Baby,i hope u faster come going sept liao..hope time will pass faster nah..i love u mak mak u....

Missing u,

Saturday, October 24, 2009



I dont feel so good these days.dont know y.i really want u to come out faster,be with me. I think i miss u very very everynight i go out and get alot of girls,but chao chiu mai dai,cos kit terng u mak mak.

darling,we are going to get married soon,but im so scared....i scared wat if one day u dont love me anymore? I scared wat if one day ur sick of me? Baby pls tell me...tell me we will last, pls tell me that this love of ours is rak jin jin. Everyone thinks im stupid,n i feel so fucking sad..cos no one knows that i love you so very deeply.

Baby,now have to wait till november then can see u again..i really waiting for u nah. I love you baby.every day and night, i love you....


Friday, October 23, 2009

4 am


Im drunk again. But i love you. Very much

Ur drunkard

Thursday, October 22, 2009

2 am

ur husband is drunk tonight...

But cannot forget to tell u everynight, i love you!

Ur drunk darling,

Wednesday, October 21, 2009

12 : 23 AM


Today i very very happy already. I finally saw u, talk to u and JOOP JOOP u!! 555
I know u receive my letter already, keep it well ok? I will write more letters to me. U can check with prison see if you can write back. ok?

Ma ma and ah may go back already. Ah may going to JB, so she come and see you very easy. and i will also check with lawyer to get the visit card soon alright? U believe me ok? I will do my best to come and see you.

Just now i send ma ma to airport, ma ma ask me to promise her, must bring you go back to udon thani together, Ma ma want to see us get married. So Gina, dont worry, everything you leave it to me. I will fulfil my promises, we just need to be patient and keep our faith strong ok?

Never worry about our love ok? It is here to stay..i am waiting..waiting for you my wife. Mrs Lai,I love you, each and every single day. ok?

Mr Lai

Monday, October 19, 2009

22 : 36 pm


I just come back. Just now go eat dinner with my ma ma, ur ma ma and may. The 2 ma mas get along well, just never talk much. keep smiling at each other. 555. After eating then i send ma ma home, then send ur ma ma and may back to hotel. Ma ma ask me promise her, to bring u back to her safely,make me promise her that we will go back udon thani tgt. so u mai dong kit mak, i will wait for u, n do wat meh ask me to do. Ok? I will not disappoint her. Everything i do for you.

Tmr is ur second court hearing,not sure if u will be attending.but u say u will call may right? she already pass her sim card to me. I waiting for u to call. I really miss u so much, i scared i hear ur voice i will cry. I really want to talk to u very very badly.

Baby, tmr ma ma n may going home. I will send them to airport. But dont worry, they will come back soon to visit u ok nah? U be good girl inside, then time will pass very very fast.

Love,i will go sleep now..u must know and believe, that i love you with all my heart. Now, and forever. I love you. Goodnight ti lak...

many love and kisses,

Sunday, October 18, 2009

11:21 PM

Your ma ma and me. 555

11:09 PM


I am your good boy. i listen to you, today bring ma ma go sentosa liao, she very happy. see the Merlion. Then after that i bring her go eat Crabs ! ma ma today eat alot.. i never see her eat so many. But she say peng mak mak, i tell her mai pen rai. As long as ma ma happy, i am happy already.

Baby... i am very excited and waiting for the day u come out. We can share a life together, hug u to sleep everynight. You can cook for me, i can wash your clothes for you, we will watch tv together, go shopping together, and we can go back to the village to visit ma ma and pa pa together.

Love, i want to be with you, for the rest of my life. I am greatful to you for wanting to be with me till i die. U are the happiness in my life, and i thank god for letting me find you. Baby, i love you, so much, i think my love will last a few lifetimes, and can you be my wife, not only for now, but for my many lifetime to come?

I need to go now baby. But before i go, i want to tell you, I love you mak mak.

Your husband to be,

Saturday, October 17, 2009

11.44 pm


Today me n may n mama stay at home. Tmr i will bring mama go sentosa see merlion. Ok mai? I will do what u want me to do. =)

Ma call me lu rak today! 555. Like you ah, baby love. Dont worry baby, i am happy because ma ma and may with me. Aya with me also.. Aya will stay in singapore so i will meet her to talk to her. Aya really care for me, make me happy ah.

Dont worry for me, ma ma say give me wear your King Rama.say i am like King, make me strong, make me smart, make me got power for you. Ma say i am king, u are queen, n i am your hero. Baby, i promise u, i will always be strong and be your hero.

Ah may and aya got ktv today. Later i will go and pick her up. We hope you are here with us. Aya say she miss u quentin her. Haha. U miss aya or not? She quentin u today. Ask me to give her my heart. I say my heart not with me, mai chai give her. She ask why i no heart, i say my heart give you liau. Haha.

Darling, mai dong kit mak. Khao jai bor? I will listen to you, wait for you nah. Then we marry. Ok mai? I got big big surprise for you. Sure you happy mak mak. =)

I go sleep first,later need to wake up find aya n ah may later. U sleep well ok? Remember ok? i love you very much, wait for u come out, be my wife ok? I love baby, goodnight...

Your husband to be,

Friday, October 16, 2009

10:35 PM


sorry today cannot come in to see you. Prison don't let me go in. but i ask lawyer to help already. lets pray we can see each other soon. ok? I know u miss me. I miss u alot too. i let may wear my key, so u know, even if i cannot see u, im just right outside waiting for u. ok? I really miss you alot, and i love you alot. Dont worry.

Gina, i am very happy, that u agreed to marry me. i am happy that u say u will be with me till the day u die or i throw u away. but my dearest wife, i will never throw u away. I swear.

and before i can say this to u in person, let me say this to you know,

My dearest Ning, i swear to the moon and the stars, that through the good and bad times, i promise to never forsake you. For each and every rising sun, i will love you, protect you, care for you..until i breathe my last. and i hold this promise in our hearts, and may this be my only union of promises in my present life, and you, will be, my one and only, wife.

Mi Mi ah, like what u have asked me to do, wait for you, be with you. I am right here waiting...

I love you, and Ning, thank you, for loving me too.

Your dearest husband,

Thursday, October 15, 2009

10:30 PM


Tomorrow, 930 AM, we meet you nah!!!!!! u happy mai? I happy mak mak! Ma ma also happy mak mak. Today everyone sleep tomorrow see you will look suai mak mak. Baby, i have really done alot, to make this possible, really really hope ma ma can see you tomorrow.

Today Collin and Junior came over and May teach me how to cook green curry and everyone says its aloy mak mak. How i wish u were here today...but mai dong worry.when u are out, i will cook alot of thai food for u..everyday let u eat, until u fat fat ok? even if u fat fat, i still rak u mak mak..jin jin!

I go sleep early tonight, tomorrow we need to go find you very early.ok? Goodnight, I miss you and i really really love you very much..

I love you baby,

2:47 AM

Joop Joop!

2:38 AM


Today Ah May cook! Tom Yum Goong, Khai jiao mu sap and Green curry. ALOY MAK MAK!
555. remember my friends? like Aya? they came to eat dinner also. Ma ma very happy. Laugh alot, smile also..happy mak mak.

ma ma and ah may now happy u mai dong kit mak ok? Dont worry, i am here, i will take care of them and make them happy..

Your ma ma really today happy abit already..i aee mama happy, i happy also. If i happy, baby will you be happy? Baby i miss you very much..but i promise you, i will help you all the way no matter wat. Even if the whole world thinks im stupid, laugh at me, but i dont care. I love you, so i am responsible for you. And once i have decided to stick it out with you, there is no turning back. I only want you to be happy. Baby, dont worry, even if u are not here by my side, i will still keep my faith in us, and stay truthful to you. You have my word, my heart.

There will never be another person i love.
I love you, and only you and its true...goodnight thee rak.

lovingly yours,

Tuesday, October 13, 2009

10:54 PM


Ma Ma and Ah May are in Singapore already! They are now at my house, and both of them are sleeping already.

Dont worry ok? I will take good care of them. Today i bring them to Thai embassy, then went golden mile to have lunch.

You know Ma ma say we look the same, like to eat the same things and even the way we drive is similar! 555
Do u think we have so many things in common?

baby, i am very happy. Finally the day is coming, we can all see you already. I really want to tell you, i love you in person. Just 3 more days ok?

Tomorrow ah may is going to make, when are you going to make dinner for me? Khai Jiao Mu Sap! I will wait for the day that you cook our favourite dish!

Love, im going to sleep now, you sleep well too ok? But before i sleep, i want you to know, I love you very much. jin jin.


Monday, October 12, 2009

11:05 PM


i got fever.. =(

maybe miss you too much, until i sick already..i eat my medicine, going to sleep soon. How i wish u were beside me and hug me to sleep..feel so much like crying now. but dont worry baby, i will drink more water and nurse myself back to health.

tonight must sleep early, cos need to have plenty of rest, then tomorrow morning go and fetch May and your mom. Are you excited? 4 more days for them to see you..

Baby, i love you..very much. i go sleep first ok? Goodnight my love.

Loving you so much



i just came back from Mustafa. Everytime i go mustafa, i think of you cos we went shopping there once. Remember? And u use to stay near there..i would go up everytime to keep u company. May say her friend saw you inside, we heard that you have cut your hair, and her friend say u still look very pretty. i believe that too. I knew you will be pretty no matter wat. I cant wait to see your new haircut.

Just now, i went to buy some food for May and your mom. So they will have something to snack on when i go to work. Dont worry ok? I will take good care of the both of them.

Gina, they are going to see you on Friday, please continue to sleep and eat well so they will see the best of you on that day. I know it would defintely ease their mind. Baby, i still miss you very much everyday and i know for many days to come, it will stay the same.

I am going to sleep now cos tomorrow need to work. Before i sleep, i want to tell you, i love you very much and it will stay this way for a very very long time. Goodnight baby...

I love you,

Sunday, October 11, 2009

5:13 AM

Good morning baby..

I just came home..went to play poker with a few friends..
Today i sent mama and papa off..they went to Japan for holidays. They want u to take good care of yourself.

Love, the reason i write to u everyday is because i know this is the only way i can keep in touch with u. I have not forgotten how you look like..i have not forgotten the days we spent happily with each other. Every day, almost every other hour, i think of those times i was holding your hand, kissing you good night..sometimes when i drive, i look at the passenger seat and think of u. things are never the same anymore. Every night before i sleep, i take a few minutes to "talk" to you. It seems as though you are just right beside me.

Of course, there are days when i get emotionally very worn out. I keep thinking if things will be the same when u come out and i worry how can we be together eventually as you can never come to Singapore anymore. Nevertheless, im still keeping faith, that if our love is strong enough,eventually we will find a way out of this.

Right now, i keep telling myself everyday, no matter wat happens, i still must have hope. Only hopes can keep me and us alive now. I want to go through this with you because i love you so much and i want to be with you. And i will be strong and take good care of myself. Because i know how terrible it is to lose someone i love, therefore i will never allow you to ever feel this way. I want you to be happy. Happy today, tomorrow and many days to come.

Baby, i will hang on. For you, and for us. I love you. I really really do.

Goodnight my love, i am another one day closer to you.

Loving you always,

Saturday, October 10, 2009

3:45 AM

hi baby,

Today was such a bad day. I called the prison, and they told me i need to translate your birth certificate. I called thai embassy, n had to use a approved translator to translate your birth cert into english. Then bring it back to Thai embassy to notorized! Damn it. Why couldnt they tell me earlier??? In total, it will tk 3 working days.

I have to change the air tickets, so now ah may and your mom will come on tuesday. But im glad that everything is settled. Lets hope we can get ur birth cert notorized just in time for the prison. I really want u to see ur mom n may. Pls pray with me as well ok?

Tonight i went ICON. But i good boy. Never butterfly. Because i want nobody nobody but you! Khao jai mai? Mi mi ah liao kap. Chao xiu mai dai na! =)

Baby, i hope u will take gd care of yourself. Let ur mom n jeh see a happy n healthy u ok? So they wont worry. I will go sleep now, but of course, i want to tell you. I love you very much. Very very much. Goodnight thee rak.


Thursday, October 8, 2009

8:32 PM


I finally settle May and your mom's air ticket to Singapore. Dont worry ok nah!
very funny...cos when i book air tickets, Jet star never ask me for their passport weird. but shouldnt be any problem cos i key in my credit card number, and it says confirmed and i have mailed the confirmation ticket to May's Email address...

Baby...are you well inside? please eat and sleep well ok? Dont let us worry for you. I am getting better as days go by..i still miss you terribly, but i keep telling myself to be strong and wait for the day you return to my side. You just need to stay happy for me. Ok mai?

Today i feel so going to sleep early ok?
But of course before i sleep, i want to tell you, i love you so very much. I love you, I love You, I love you. I really do.

Goodnight baby, i hope tonight you will have sweet dreams...

Loving you,



I just got home. I went out with my AYA today. remember them? My friends who are like Aya? =)
went to shop around with them then went for dinner... sometimes when i see them, it reminds me of you as well..cos i know they use to make fun of you.

Today May went to bangkok, she say she will try to work there to earn some $. Then your mom will go bangkok and meet her and come singapore together. I am going to help them book tickets tomorrow. I hope you are happy after hearing this.

My dearest love, i am going to sleep early tonight ok? Because im really tired and sleepy nah..
I hope you will sleep well tonight and have the sweetest dream.. goodnight baby, I love you so much..


Tuesday, October 6, 2009

11:27 PM

Ti Rak,

i miss you alot. nothing makes me feel better except you. wherever i go, i keep thinking how nice it'd be if you were beside me or take a walk with me in the park. have meals together. watch a movie...there are so many so many things i want to do with you...sometimes i imagine you are beside me, it makes me feel better...

there was this one time, before you were my gf, i imagined, How nice it would be if you can be my gf. you can never imagine how happy i was when we went out for our first date. Does it mean, if i think of you and want you bad enough, my dreams will come true?

My love, i miss you so much everyday...10 more days. 10 more days, and i may have a chance to see you.

Today May called me, ask me to speak to you mom and assure her that you'd be fine. I told your mom, that you will be safe, and you will eat and sleep well and take good care of yourself. Baby, please do so ok? else i'll be be letting your mom down.

My dearest love, i'll be sleeping now. but before i sleep, i really want to say this to you -
I love you..i really really do...


12:39 AM


Today was the first day of work. I quite like the job, because it is not stressful and my new colleagues are friendly and helpful.

Oh, by the way, i saw your จองหอง มาก มาย เพื่อน at golden mile. Essart! 555

How are you today baby? got eat and sleep properly? wait a while more ok? 16 Oct is only 10 days away. You can see your ma ma and phee rak soon.

Tonight, i am not going to say I love you, but i will sing you a song! ok mai?

Have I told you lately that I love you
Have I told you theres no one else above you
Fill my heart with gladness
Take away all my sadness
Ease my troubles thats what you do

For the morning sun in all its glory
Greets the day with hope and comfort too
You fill my life with laughter
And somehow you make it better
Ease my troubles thats what you do

Theres a love thats divine
And its yours and its mine like the sun
And at the end of the day
We should give thanks and pray
To the one, to the one

Have I told you lately that I love you
Have I told you theres no one else above you
Fill my heart with gladness
Take away all my sadness
Ease my troubles thats what you do



Sunday, October 4, 2009

10:52 PM


how are u today? its raining again..please keep warm ok?

Today May went to the temple, will only come back tomorrow. I will confirm with her the air tickets soon and book for both her and your mom.

Tomorrow will be my first day at work, so i will try to sleep early tonight...but before i go...

Tonight Im tangled in my blanket of clouds
Dreaming aloud
Things just wont do without you, matter of fact
Im on your back, Im on your back, Im on your back

If you walk out on me, Im walking after you
If you walk out on me, Im walking after you

If youd accept surrender, Ill give up some more
Werent you adored
I cannot be without you, matter of fact
Im on your back, Im on your back, Im on your back

If you walk out on me, Im walking after you
If you walk out on me, Im walking after you

Another heart is cracked in two, Im on your back
I cannot be without you, matter of fact

Im on your back

Darling, i will always be watching over you. no matter where you may be.
Goodnight my love, I love you, very much.

Loving you,

2:21 AM

Morning Darling,

Just know went to meet my friend for coffee. And she stays near Changi. I did a very silly thing. I drove myself to Changi Womens Prison, and stopped outside for a while hoping to feel closer to you. Baby, i know you must be feeling confused about us right now. Especially after so long when we did not have any communications. Please be strong, my feelings for you are exactly the same when i first met you. Trust my heart i love you all the same, and i will not give up on you, will not give up on us. I will not look at another 2nd girl, as you are already my wife in my heart. I will take care of you till the day you die, and even for my next life, i know i still want to be with you, and love you all the same.

Thee rak, all i ask is for you to have a piece of mind. Remember you once said, and i will always remember; you will believe me, as long as i want you to. I am asking you, my love, to believe me. Believe i will always love you and only you. There will be no one else. You will be the one i want to see every morning, and kiss you goodnight every night.

Although now i cannot really kiss you goodnight, i will keep my promise to say, I Love You every single day. I really do.

Goodnight my love, You are one day closer, to be right back in my arms.

Loving you, every second..

Saturday, October 3, 2009

2:25 AM

Good morning baby,

I spent the whole day resting and doing research at home. Asked May to enquire more on the shophouse at Soi Jinto Kam. The rent is about 6000 BHT a month, with a room upstairs. Lets hope she has good news for us as i like the location. Its behind the University, so customer mak mak di!

The shop use to sell 2nd hand phones and and clothes, with abit of furniture and fittings, lets hope it can be used at a small restaurant. I spoke to Collin bout it, shes just as excited as me. We can do what we are good at! Cooking! and earn a simple living.

I also did abit of research on the various types of Visas we can apply. Since Collin's mom is still holding a Thai national passport, i believe she can apply for Non Immigration Visa valid for a year.
Im not sure if my dad is holding a PR or thai ID, most likely i will have to apply for Business Visa that will be valid for 1 year, else my last option is an extended social visa for 90 days, extendable for another 21 days at Nong Khai Immigration crossing Laos... Not that bad, at least its only 45 mins drive away from Udon Thani.

Are you excited? Cos i am planning this hopefully to give u a big surprise when your out. But i shant tell you too much, as what Rong Rak says, "dont jinx it"

I hope u will be happier as days goes by. I am really working hard out here to figure a way out for the both of us. Remember, at the end of the day we have got each other to hold on to.

Rak, I love you. I really really do.


Friday, October 2, 2009

2:33 AM


Today is finally the last day of my work! Tmr, sat and sun i can rest at home. Ma Ma ask me where are you. She say, you still have some clothes in the cupboard, ask me to wash for you!
I already wash alot of your clothes nah, tmr still need to wash somemore! But its ok. I am happy to wash clothes for you. =))

Today, went to find a friend. Talked about some plans about opening a store in Udon Thani. In this way, you can be close to your family and we can also earn a living. What do you think?
We can get a shophouse, downstairs can sell noodles, upstairs got 2 room, we can stay there together. Do you like that idea? When holiday comes, we can go bangkok and shop! I feel so happy thinking about it. I will go there with friend on the 30th of Oct. Then we can see around for a nice location, if we see something we like, we can rent it down. When the holiday comes, we can go bangkok for shopping! I feel happy just thinking about it.

Love, its almost a month since you are away, nothing has changed. I still miss you everyday and still waiting for the day i can have you in my arms. How i wish u can know wat u are thinking of now.

I will be patient and wait for your homecoming. Mi mi ah liao kap. Chao siu mai dai! I hope you sleep well tonight, dont worry so much. We can only wait now, and i am hopeful that it will be a sweet homecoming.

Gina, I love you. very much, Goodnight my dear...

Missing you always,

Thursday, October 1, 2009

3:00 AM


Just came back from supper after work. Tomorrow is the last day! i am so happy. I will be starting a new phase in work and i hope that means one day closer to u too!

Sometimes i miss you so much, i will just go shopping and buy things for you. It makes me feel better as i feel connected to you. Till date, i have bought a gold chain, a top and 2 winnie the pooh poster for you. I hope u like the presents. i cant wait to give them to you. =D

Have a received my letter? Please write to me if you have ok? i really miss u very much and want to hear from you soon. I will still continue to write you letters every 2 weeks.

I am going to sleep now, but of course, before i go, i want to tell you, I Love you, and will continue to do so for as long as i can.

with lots of love,

Wednesday, September 30, 2009

2:10 AM


How are you today? As usual i miss you terribly today. May is at Udon Thani already. She will bring your mom to do her passport very soon. I promise you, even if i cannot see you, i'll make sure you see your family members first alright? Bear with me for a little while, everything will be okay soon.

My work is going to end soon, and i will be starting my new job on Monday. I hope that my new job will be better than the old one..

Time is really crawling baby, and im enduring as much as i can. Sometimes at night, i will cry, cos i miss you too much. I dont know how to tell you, though our relationship is one of the shortest one, but i love you to a state that i cannot imagine. Will our paths continue to cross 9 months later?
My friend told me, as long as we are alive, we still have another shot at it. Like you, i have never been lucky in my love life, so i can ask this of you? can u be my last? can you be the last girl in my life to love?

Gina, no matter how hard or tough this may be, i pray everyday and night that this will be over soon. I pray for the strength to carry on this journey to ask for nothing but your love. My love is for you to keep for as long as u want...let tonight be a good good night, and for all the nights to come, i am still telling you, I Love You very much. indeed, very very much.

Loving you,

Tuesday, September 29, 2009

2:41 AM

Thee Rak,

Sorry to write late today. Work until 12am, then went to eat with my friends at Golden Mile.

Thee Rak, today i am very unhappy. Everyone thinks im okay, but actually i feel extremely sad deep down. I really want to see you and talk to you very badly, but i cannot. The prison warden says because i have a traffic offence before therefore its considered a criminal record. I dont know when i can ever see you again. It seems like its going to be a long while before i can talk to you.

Have you received my letter? I will send another letter to you again. I really hope you will write back to me. I really miss you so much, every single minute i think of you, think of holding you...its getting so painful as the days goes by.

My dearest love, its raining again all of a sudden. Please keep yourself warm ok? I wish i can hug u to sleep, and while u drift away into dreamland, let me kiss you on your forehead and whisper softly, I Love You softly into your ear. Goodnight love.

Loving you dearly,

Monday, September 28, 2009

1:13 AM

Thee Rak,

Today really very tired. Dont know why. Didnt talk to May much also. Tomorrow she going back to Udon and will bring your mama to make her passport.

I am very unhappy today. But even if i am unhappy, i try my best to pretend everything is okay. I still force myself to eat and rest. Because i need the energy to stay alive, to see you again.

No matter how tired i am, i still miss you very much & no matter how i tired i may be, tonight, i still want to tell you, that I Love you very much. I really do.

Good night my love and will u please tell me in my dreams, that everything will be okay? I need your love so much.

Forever yours,

Saturday, September 26, 2009



Ah May reach Bangkok safely already. I just called her. She is okay, she say the room still has your smell & she misses you so much.

She called your friend porche, and she will go over to accompany Ah may later. I will call Ah May again at 11 pm to make sure shes ok.

Ah May will go and find your Mom once she settle the house with the agent in BKK, and your mom will be coming very soon to Singapore ok? 3 of us will come see you... =D

How i wish i can just hug u now, and tell u everything will be okay. Everything will be over soon. Please stay strong love, i am sure dawn will come after darkness and i look forward to have you in my arms again. I will hold you so tight i'll never left u leave my side anymore. I promise to love you, make you happy and smile every day.

Today is a boring Saturday without u. I will just stay home and think of you. But of course, before i go tonight, Let me tell you, I Love you.



กรุณา พูดใช่ !

Friday, September 25, 2009

4:06 AM

Ti Rak,

today i very happy. Cos Ah May call me Nong Rak, and i call her Pi Rak. Both of us will work very hard to earn $ and wait for you to come out. Ti Rak Nong Rak and Pi Rak will have a happy happy life in Thailand. Are you happy?

Me and Pi Rak talk alot about you today on the phone. I tell her, we only have each other now. We will support each other emotionally through this...U dont worry ok? We will be able to get through this together...

Ti Rak, everyday i still miss you very much. No matter how people can say i am stupid or foolish, i will still follow my heart, and that heart is already yours to keep. I will stay strong, and true to it irregardless.

The best thing in life is to have a love thats true and sincere, through you, i found love, not only yours, but also sister love through Ah May. Ti Rak, thank you for coming into my life, and thank you for loving me.

This heart of mine only has this to say - I Love You, and i always will.

Rak Jin Jin,

Wednesday, September 23, 2009

11:38 PM


how are you today? Today i go work, so tiring. Jd's hearing is tomorrow, but i wont be going cos need to work.

I have good news for you.. May going back to BKK on friday already. Then will bring your mom to do her passport. After that they will be coming to Singapore to see you in Oct. Your mom and ah may will stay at my place, and i will accompany them to visit you. I really hope the warden allows me to go in with them, cos i really want to see you too.
I miss you so badly till i cannot sleep well these days.

Rak, do u miss me too? I put all your clothes on my bed cos it has ur smell. It seems as though u are sleeping right beside me. Sometimes if im a little bit lucky, i may even dream of u. Thats the only time i can feel you, and that is so important to me.

Today, i was telling my friend, how much i hate myself, for not loving you any earlier. If i had just be honest to my feelings and told u straight from the start, will we be apart right now? Its so unbearable not to have u by my side really. I was just getting addicted to you, and u were already something i couldnt/wouldnt stop.

My dearest love, tonight is just another painful and dreary night without you, and it wouldnt be complete if i hadnt say this to you, I hope my love will bring you home one day. I love you very much. Goodnight...

Ti Rak, Dawn

Tuesday, September 22, 2009

9:26 PM

When I am with you, we stay up all night.
When you're not here, I can't go to sleep.

Ti Rak...i miss you everyday..i sleep only when i get physically worn out. And even in my sleep, you are running around in my mind..

I am going to pick Ah May up and send her to the airport this friday. She will go back to bkk then Udon Thani to meet your mother, then they will come back to SG to visit you. Be patient ok? I am doing everything i can to let them see you soonest.

Ti Rak, i'll try to have an early night today, but of course, before i go, i just want to say, I Love You.
very much.

Love, Dawn

12:21 AM

Ti Rak,

Its raining know how missing someone gets awfully unbearable when it rains?

I slept alot today and i dreamt of you. It was a happy dream.

We shared a really big apartment, on the 4th level. We cooked dinner together, watched TV in each other's arms and fell asleep on our big comfortable bed. Its a dream i know, but its a dream that i want so badly to come true. Do you feel the same way too?

I hope you are doing fine inside. Its starting to rain abit these days, please keep yourself warm, eat your meals and sleep well at night ok? I know it may be boring and time seems to be crawling. But remember, we are all waiting for you patiently out here for the big reunion. I hope we will all be in time for Song Kran in Bangkok. I promise, by the time you come back to Bangkok, it would be a whole new life for us.

I need to sleep earlier today cos tomorrow have to go to work at 8 in the morning, but of course, before i sleep, i still want to tell you, my love, Chan Rak Kun. I love you very much.

Sweet dreams, loving you always,


Monday, September 21, 2009

5:28 am

Another bad case of missing you...

Spoke to your sister about the apartment in Ratchada. May mentioned that she may move to another cheaper apartment, and since I am going to get a job in Bkk, i suggested to move to somewhere which is ideally near my workplace and convenient for her too. I am thinking of getting a bigger apartment so when you come out, 3 of us can stay together. What do you think? I intend to also get a puppy for you, so you wont be too bored when i go to work. =) Do you like that idea?

Rak, the only i can keep myself happy now is to plan for us. Sometimes i dream of our future home, dream of how life would be if we can live a life together. Do you think my dreams will come true? My friends think that its such a brave move on my part to give up everything in Singapore and move to Bangkok with you. But, i think otherwise, honestly, it didn't take me much courage to decide, it just came to me so naturally that i actually have no fear about relocating.

Rak, while your inside, rest assured that my love didnt just stop, neither did it even suspend for a split moment. I still think of you, and miss you terribly everyday. Today, i took one of your sweater out from your luggage and hugged it to sleep. It felt as though you were just beside me. Thats the least i can hold on to now.

Everyday i pray, that i am indeed one day closer to you. And for the goodnight kiss i cannot give again tonight, i am still sure, that i love you, very much. Goodnight Ning, i hope i see you in my dreams.

Love, Dawn

Sunday, September 20, 2009

Sunday 1.23 Am

Someone told me i should write when i miss someone terribly. So here i am.

Its been 19 days that you have been away from me. I wonder how you are doing inside, if your eating and sleeping well and i want to know whats weighing on your mind. Tell me all about it.

I would remember always when i first met you at Sabai. It was the start of something i never want to end.

I met your sister today. She was telling me how you use to call out to me, asking jd if im ok, if im free to see you. I felt happy yet miserable at the same time, hating myself for not making the first call to you. Will things be different now? would life take a different turn if i went on searching for you from the start? I never even wished you happy birthday for a start, but if i can, will you allow me to spend your every birthdays with u, until the day i die?

Oh, today May taught me something new..mi mi ah lai kap, chao siu mai dai. =)

Gina, remember? if i am happy, you will be happy. and i am staying happy, for you, my love.

If i were to choose to meet you, and go through this all over again, i would. I will gladly, go through these long lonely nights without you, hoping and pining for the day you'd sleep beside me again.

Today is just another night, i go through missing you hopelessly till i fall asleep. For a start, your lovely picture for me to stare at till i drift away.

For the goodnight kiss i am unable to give you today, let me whisper to you gently, I Love You. Rak Kun jin jin.